My oasis of the week

I love my Family to Family class. Last night's class was awesome. We split into groups (parents with a child who has a mental illness; spouses of someone with a mental illness and children of a parent with a mental illness) and talked about what was unique about our situation. I was the only one who was there for a spouse and since Pam (my mom's co-teacher) also had a spouse with a mental illness we got to talk about it. People had actually asked Pam why she stayed with her husband (who died over 10 years ago but Pam was with him until the day he died). Why would someone ask that? Would you be offended if I asked why you stayed with your spouse who was diagnosed with cancer? Why would anyone be so rude? When people get married do their vows say in sickness and in health or until you get a mental illness? NO IT DOESN'T!!!!!!!!
Because of my husband's mental illness I have to take over the household responsibilities. I have to take care of the bills and housework. I have to be the bread winner and provide health insurance for us. When we have children of our own I will have to work while he stays home with the kid(s). I always wanted to be a stay at home mom, but I have to realize that it may never happen. It doesn't make me love my husband any less because of his mental illness. I actually admire him for living with it and being able to survive when a lot of people with mental illnesses commit suicide.
Because of all the responsibility on my shoulders I realized that I need to see a counselor to help me get through this situation. I have to deal with so much stress right now with financial, work and Steve's illness being the most stressful things I am going through.
I am so grateful for my family and Steve's family -- both who have supported Steve and I so much during this time. I know that I would have fallen apart weeks ago if it hadn't have been for them. Steve and I are so lucky to have them in our lives.